Today im thinking about learning.
That i would be unbearably bored if i were to stop learning new things, whether or not they sound big, or important, or just terms i dont know, or random societal type twitches.
That people who have teachers are very lucky. Had to trial and error my way through almost everything.
And that there is so much out there for me to learn and explore still! Have more things i want to try than i have time and funds….
I havent posted in a long while in internet time… thank you to everyone thats ever read, followed, liked, or generally checked out my randomosity! 🙂
I’ve been in paradigm shift for too long now. Im exhausted. And overwhelmed. And… happy?
Its really the happy bit thats scaring me lately. Every time thats cropped up in my life before; everything else in my life has crashed and burned around it…. like if one thing is going well or making me happy, everything else must compensate.
But, fuck it, see what happens is slowly becoming my motto. I have a hard time believing i deserve what i want; but im sooooo tired of suborning what i want and who i am to try and please someone else.
Whats the worst that could happen?
Im noticing more and more how many people seem utterly defined by one negative event in their lives. Rage, hate, or the martyr reaction bleed forward and backward; coloring every other experience.
And then you meet someone that has been through terrible things and manages to seperate it from who they are as a person, accepts that it happened but refuses to be defined by it, or to allow it to become who they are.
Anyone else heard the latest metaphysical drivel about not needing to eat food and living off the sun’s energy? Wow… id love to get my roomate to sign up for that shit… hes already obsessed with pyschic powers and thinks soap is bad for you. Yes, soap. The cornerstone of modern and largely plague-free civilization. ( with the expected smell results )
Hell, id like to advertise this plan (?) to hippies en masse. Just to see who Darwins themself out.